Joy Unspeakable

I’ve been back for a week now. My family was falling apart without me. I can honestly say there’s no place I’d rather be than here right now. I know exactly what’s going on with my mom and siblings and I’m at a place mentally and emotionally where I can care for them. That gives me peace.

NJ was great. I wouldn’t trade that experience for anything in the world. I truly had to face myself and learn who I was and what I wanted and who I wanted to be. Now that I know who that is, I can be that person anywhere I choose. I also was blessed to learn where I came from, what my family was like, what people were like…I left with a totally different mentality of life and what’s important to me. I’m so humbled and grateful.

I have so much joy and peace in my heart now. I may not show it always, but I feel so good all the time inside. I’ve prayed for this my whole life. Things go wrong, I do stress, I may cry; I’m human. But, what I’ve learned for sure is that God is and always has been my source. My faith in Him is stronger than ever before which means I also have more faith in myself. My confidence is at an all time high, I feel beautiful, smart, intelligent, daring, spontaneous…things I knew I was but didn’t have the courage to be in this element. Now, I don’t care for the opinions of others. I literally “do me” now and it feels amazing.

I have visions for things I want to do and I know that God is going to begin opening doors for me. I’m so excited for what is to come in my life. I’m free forreal now. This has been the best journey of my life and it’s just begun. Even though I came home to help my mom, for once I feel like I have purpose HERE in Indiana and I need to fulfill that. And if I never live anywhere else, I’m kind of ok with that….words I never thought I’d say. This is home. My heart, my family, my people are here. I hope my husband is too 🙂

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